The majority of people in our society do not know how to handle anger. To free our culture from their addiction and preoccupation with violence, we need to establish a healthy relationship with anger. Until a critical mass of people has cleared their emotional body of old unprocessed anger created during their childhood years, society will continue to fuel the fire of violence and hatred.

There is nothing wrong with feeling anger. It is a natural response to a violation of our security and instinctual response to unmet needs.

Anger is associated with vast amounts of negative energy. If we repress anger once it arises instead of expressing it in a way not directed at others, the negative energy associated with it intensifies. If we are not able to express anger healthily, we will end up directing it upon others or ourselves and it will dump us in depression and lead to dis-ease.

Feeling and taking cognisance of anger as opposed to venting it upon others are two vastly different things.
We have the right to feel, express and release our anger, but we have no right to take it out on others.

Because most of society is emotionally unbalanced, we rarely grow up in households where healthy expression of anger is modelled. It is far more common to see unprocessed anger expressed in the form of rage that leads to physical violence or psychological wounding.

Despite violent behaviour being very scary and upsetting to minors, they eventually become desensitised to violence and will adopt it as a coping mechanism in later years. This leads to a snowball reaction that perpetuates the problem.   

In families where the anger is repressed and constantly lurking below the surface, it causes malaise or depression that permeates and impacts everyone in the household.

A very dysfunctional expression of anger that is common in families is the “cold shoulder” syndrome The angry person never verbally communicates what he or she is feeling and instead expresses anger by withholding love and communication which leaves deep psychological scars, especially in those growing up in these families.

The solution is to teach society how to express their anger in a healthy and non-violent way.

I have seen that once depressed clients have been guided to access their anger and direct it where it needs to go, their depression is released.

The appropriate expression of anger heals old wounds and is empowering. Any negative sense of self that has been repressed can now emerge and be released leaving the client with strength, courage and confidence.  

We all deserve to be treated with love, respect and dignity and to be honoured for who we are. Addressing your anger will go a long way toward creating it.